Goo - 'Oh Wow, Oh Well' Tour Diary - Euro Leg Part 1 (The Heatwave Chronicles)

Day 1 - Keighley, UK to Le Portel, France

The night before, Hovis and I picked up the van from Ibex Van Hire in Leeds and packed the van at Goo HQ ready for an early morning departure. We were all pretty conscious of it being Tanisha’s birthday on the travel day, so we wanted a smooth and quick journey to France (and so we could go out for a few drinks when we arrived of course). I drove the hilariously huge van off our wee driveway to collect everyone, and as we’re all living out in the villages around Keighley these days, you have to navigate the van around some narrow streets. It’s a pretty effective way to wake yourself up to be fair! Tanisha and I can never shake the feeling that we’ve left something behind, but you’ve gotta shrug it off and hope for the best.

We have a couple of guests with us on this run; Sheep (Hovis’ dad) who was once guitarist in local heroes The Undecided and later Indianic, and bass player Joe who’s filling in for Bryn for the two gigs in Tours. It was a pretty uneventful journey down (which is a good thing) except for the fact that we are cutting it fine as usual… check-in closes at 15:24… arrival time 15:24… nice work, goo. Hovis and I share the driving duties, and we usually make a point of not driving for more than 2 hours before switching. But without a second of wiggle room; we went for it and I drove the whole 5.5 hour journey to the Eurotunnel in Folkestone in one fell swoop (what a hero). When we arrived, we found out that our train was delayed by an hour and a half, then it was half an hour delayed, then it was two hours… We could've stopped for a piss afterall, but hey ho. 

Band people tend to get antsy when there’s nothing to do, so we went to duty free and picked up 96 cans of lager and 200 cigs for the trip. Laugh all you want, it did save us a few quid in the long run (although it was Sheep’s treat in the end, so technically the band spent nothing - winner!). It was Sheep and Joe’s first trip on the Eurotunnel so they didn’t really know what to expect, which brought back memories of Sam’s first trip when he asked if we’d see any fish during the crossing. No comment. Once we arrived in Calais, we were swiftly on our way (on the right side of the road) to Le Portel; a small coastal village with a population of about 9000. I thought the roads in our villages were tight, but Le Portel's narrow streets were something else! We parked at the accommodation, bagsied our rooms (Sam was on the inflatable mattress) and went to the beach for a few cold ones at Aux Chalets du Fort. “Bonjour. Je voudrais un grand Juliper, s'il vous plaît?” in the most Yorkshire of Yorkshire accents. We’d made it before sunset and Tanisha’s smiling face said that the boys done good!

What was supposed to be a quiet beer turned into something a bit bigger than we’d planned. On the way from the beach to the accommodation (which really wasn’t very far), we thought we’d call in for one more at Cafe Le Retro where we heard some fairly bad karaoke coming from inside. Goo loves bad karaoke. From here, the evening becomes a bit of a blur. What I do remember is that they had three pumps of local beer and that no one could speak a word of English (which we loved!). “Bonjour! Je voudrais un grand… this one (points), s'il vous plaît?”. We tried them all. A few times. The regulars were all singing in French, but after some serious hand signalling, one of us said “Queen!?”. The barlady’s eyes widened, she queued up ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’, and we butchered it much to everyone’s amusement. Everyone had a turn at a different song, and we continued drinking into the night. At some point, they figured out that we’re a band, so they threw on the video for ‘I Like Your Style’ and they somehow sang karaoke to that. Mad, hilarious, and amazing. Before things got too out of hand, we said (yelled) Au Revoir to everyone and headed to the local take-away for victory Kebabs all around… except we forgot that Joe is a strict vegan and there was nothing he could eat. Oops! 

One day down, eight to go!

Temperature: 27°

Day 2 - Jolly Roger Festival at Le Bateau Ivre, Tours, France

Firstly, I’m glad we didn’t do the journey to Tours from Keighley in one trip, because I am knackered this morning. When we played our first gig in France in 2023, we did an overnight drive from Keighley to Paris in our Suzuki Grand Vitara all in one go. It was intense. Never again. We’re all nursing a mild(!?) hangover from last night, but it turns out that Sheep has already been up and out into the wild, bought supplies, and is currently cooking eggs on toast for the troops. He’s pulling his weight already! It’s warm, but overcast, so we’re all excited to get into the Sun in Tours, but France is under red alert with a forecast of 35°. We’re hoping that the Le Bateau Ivre (translation: The Drunken Boat) has aircon. Sam is praying that they do. Hovis is in the driver's seat and the van is HOT. We stop for food and get hot pizza and burritos out of a vending machine, which is fascinating to us (we’re probably just overly excited to be on tour). Sheep gets a pizza which isn’t cut into slices and there’s no cutlery, so he eats it face first off the table. When he’s almost done, he finds a knife under the base. 

It’s getting hotter. We arrive at the venue, load in, marvel at the beauty of the place, then realise it doesn’t have aircon. It’s going to be a sweaty one. We’re playing the second day of a three day festival called The Jolly Roger organised by our friend Brice from Goat Cheese Promotions. This is the third time he’s booked us for a festival, and it’s always a good do. Bands on the bill: eyehategod, Dwarves, and Patient Zero. We’re opening, so we soundcheck, leave everything set up, half of us head to the dressing room and the other half head outside. The first person we bump into outside is Nick Oliveri (currently of Dwarves, ex- Queens of the Stoneage + Kyuss) and have a nice chat. He tells us that he lives in the desert, and the heat in Tours is “quite nice”. We tell him we’re English. He understands. Upstairs in the dressing room, the other half is huddled around the one fan in the room, but it’s just blowing hot air into their faces. “THE WALLS ARE SWEATING!” we hear coming from outside our door; it’s Blag Dhalia (frontman from Dwarves) pacing slowly down the corridor covered in sweat. I think everyone is starting to fret about just how hot it’s going to be on stage, so we start taking it in turns for cold showers.

We’ve got a 30 minute slot. I’m glad about that. The venue is beautiful and it’s probably about half full which is fine for an opening slot. I’m usually pretty good with heat (Filipino genes, I thank you) but this is already the hottest gig I’ve ever played - even hotter than the last time we played Tours in May 2024 at Les Beaumont (as seen at the end of the Tiny Dinosaur video). We’re all struggling with the heat and I think this is the closest I’ve ever been to passing out onstage. But, we play pretty well considering, and Joe is killing it as per usual. When we finish, we pack down in the corridor, panting and absolutely drenched in sweat, then we load the van. We head for the cold beers in the fridge backstage, then to the merch and sell a few records. I go straight for another cold shower. Literally, whenever you go, inside or outside, you can’t escape the heat. I know I’m going on about it, but it was intense. We watch Dwarves from the merch table and the people of Tours are loving it. I think they were supposed to play for an hour, but they only managed about 40 minutes before the bass amp packed up because of the heat. We went up to the balcony to watch eyehategod, who are great, and they also play a short set because it’s too hot. The venue is absolutely packed, so it’s no wonder the temperature got too much for them too. We’re booked into an Ibis just down the road. On the way there, we call at the van to grab our bags where we bump into Blag who gives us a few English accent impressions: “Tonight, on BBC 2. The Mollusk. Friend or Foe? Alright you guys, stay well”. Surreal.

We get to the hotel and IT HAS AIRCON! We are very happy. We slept well; smug and content with the cold air in the room, trying to ignore that it’s supposed to be 40° in Paris by the time we arrive…

Temperature: 35°

Day 3 - Fête de la Musique at Crafty Brewpub, Tours, France

I love a continental breakfast. We didn’t expect the breakfast at Ibis Budget to be much, but the food and coffee is very good. I ate heartily so I didn’t have to buy any lunch. We don’t have to travel today because we’re playing at Crafty Brewpub in Tours. It’s Fête de la Musique in France (World Music Day) which is an annual music celebration where citizens and residents are urged to play music outside, in their neighborhoods or in public spaces. We don’t usually get to do too much sightseeing as we’re usually driving every day, so we spent the day looking around Tours. It’s very pretty indeed with its picturesque architecture, cobbled streets, coffee shops and bars. We sat outside Cathédrale Saint-Gatien in the shade and chilled out for a bit. It’s weird not having to rush off to the next gig. 

Everyone is setting up stages, bunting, lights, and tables and chairs for the evenings proceedings. There’s a noticeable joyous feeling in the air across the city. Even though we don’t really know what to expect from tonight’s gig, we’ve gotten pretty good at just going with the flow, and we’re looking forward to whatever happens. We decided to head down to Guinguette De Tours; an outdoor bar situated alongside the Loire river where we first played the Aucard De Tours festival back in 2023. It was getting hotter, so we decided to be very English and go for a paddle in the shallows of the Loire. More Englishness followed as we started skimming stones downstream. “Look at this one!” when we found a satisfyingly flat and round ‘skimmer’. The water was too inviting to just get our feet wet, so Sam and I stripped down to our boxers and went for a swim against the current. We continued walking down to the bar and dried off in minutes. After a couple of beers in the Sun, we headed back towards the venue and called in at Boulangerie Le Fournil Saint-Julien for some grub. The fresh food and deserts on display were incredible, and we scranned down pretty hard! Well, I had a salad. And a chocolate mousse. Go figure. 

We got back to Le Crafty and sat in the shade on the curb. It's 37° and not letting up. One of the barmen arrived at speed on a scooter and asked “Why are you outside? There’s aircon inside”. Good question. For some reason, the venue has a lot of dart boards. We played for a bit, then we had a communal nap upstairs for a couple of hours. Charlotte, the promoter, tells us that they’ve never had a gig at the bar because of resident complaints. But on this holiday, they don’t have a choice. We were told that we’re playing outside beneath 3 stories of residents… I’m hoping that they don’t accidentally drop any plant pots from their windows. We set up facing into the square and soundcheck - it sounds surprisingly good! The Sun is beating down on us, but Charlotte reassures us that it’ll disappear behind the buildings at some point. It’s 7pm and we wait for the temperature to drop enough so that A. We can play without melting, and B. people will turn up. That doesn’t happen until 10pm, but when we start, it’s busy, and there’s a real vibe in the air. Even though we’re playing for over an hour, it’s already easier than last night. We’re playing really well and having a great time. The only way I can describe the event is that it’s like busking, but performing to small crowds moving around the city from one performance to another. It was a pretty unique experience. Afterwards, we had a few drinks and had charcuterie al fresco, courtesy of Le Crafty. We crashed at Charlotte’s apartment and had the hottest night’s sleep of the tour. Off to Paris first thing in the morning…

Temperature: 37°